I'm a pansexual cisgendered female and can empathize with the things that LGBT people face both on a regular basis and when in the birth world (prenatally, giving birth and postpartum). I have personally experienced some of the anti-LGBT prejudice that is unfortunately rather common in this community.
Why It Matters
You deserve to feel confident throughout your birth and have a team around you that excepts all of you and the birth you want. The more confidence you can feel the more likely you are to have a positive birth experience. Birth is a very intense time period and it is only made worse if you are surrounded by people who do not make an effort to understand you and your situation. This is true for everyone, regardless if you speak another language, come from another culture (like the LGBT community) or use different pronouns. We want you to have the most positive birth you possibly can. This can’t happen with someone who doesn’t understand you.
I Understand Your Situation
Not all doulas understand LGBT situations enough to properly work with your family. Each of us has a different and unique situation. Many doulas have never dealt with a surrogacy, don't speak with or have documents that include your preferred pronoun or preferred terminology. This is unfortunately true for healthcare professionals as well.
Female partners of birthing individuals, adopting women, and trans women all have the ability to breastfeed. Many people (doulas included) do not know that these partners can also breastfeed, and if they know this they don't know what resources can help these individuals.
Some queer individuals prefer not to have their children gendered. A healthcare professional for this type of family may need to be reminded not to say “It’s a girl!! Congratulations!!” or something similar when the baby comes out.
There are many more examples. Please know that I understand your needs and how to best work with your unique situation. With me, you're in good hands.
I Have Relevant Resources for You
Your comfort is of the utmost importance to me. We're in this together.
I will make sure all your documents include your preferred terminology if you'd like. I regularly spend time finding resources that are more suitable for LGBT families, and you will benefit from these sources being tailored more to your situation. For example, there are some LGBT-specific Facebook pages and podcasts that I follow and can provide to you.